Why Doesn't my boyfriend want to have sex with me anymore?
We've been dating for over a yer now but in the last few months our sex has drastically decreased at first started to go down from at least 1-2 times a day for at least 5 months and then it went down to 1-2 times a week and then to 1-2 times a month and now it's been a month and a half since we've had sex. I've read a few articles about this allready, but none seem to fit my problem exactly. I was worried for a while that it might be me that was the problem and but he told me it wasn't and i know he wouldn't lie to me. I've asked him about it but he says theres nothing wrong. I just don't know what to do anymore. He's only a year older than me and he's suppose to be in hes prime. Is there anything I can do? I Haven't pressured him or anything because I dont want him to do it just to shut me up. I want him to want to. and I'm just not satistied anymore and im not asking for everyday, at this point once or twice a week would be nice. A far as I know there's nothing he's stressed about at work or school, could it be a cobination of the 2? or something else going on that I don't know about? and please keep in mind that im am searching for help and advice and I don't want to hear find a new boyfriend. I love him and im not leaving him, even if it means were not going to have sex anymore. But it's frustration for the time being as I find it a tad odd that I want it more than he does. and I don't really want to talk to any of my friends abotu it because I live in a small town and this is personal and I don't need everyone talking about it. and the last thing I want him to feel is embarassed. I havn't told anyone of my friends but I'm in need of some advice. Any Ideas?
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mine is also very disinterested....every time i try to touch him intimately, he says it tickles and squirms away, which i attribute to your guy's backache and/or headache. my guy is also very stressed at work; he never knows if he'll be called in for some ridiculous thing...and it's way worse than that, believe me. he tells me he loves me as many times as yours, and he snuggles every night as well. but i know he isn't getting anything anywhere else. he's my best friend, and there's not many people I've ever been closer with. he may not be as sexually aggressive as he was when we first got together, but he's still affectionate and loving, and i trust him.
my boyfriend also snuggles with me every night. I find this almost irritating because its almost like a tease. I want to be cuddled with but I also have very strong sexual urges. Having someone that I want to have sex with stroke me and then reject my sexual advances is very frustrating. All of you are so nice when you speak of your boyfriends or husbands. I just don't think it is fair. My boyfriend and I use to have sex everyday at least. Now we have not even been together for two years and he gets annoyed everytime I initiate sex. I will even go so far as to give him a hard on and he will still reject me. I'm not going to pretend that it does not make me angry, and I think I have a right to be. Anyone have any suggestions?
I am experiencing the same rejection, my boyfriend and I became engaged a year ago. I am scared to death that he is seeking to satisfy his needs elsewhere. However, he will deny it as though I'm crazy. I am at my wits end. I am an attractive 33 year old woman that is begining to rethink marriage. He denies any "extra-curricular" invlovements when I inquire, but gives no other reason for his lack of interest. I am tired of crying and feeling undesirable. If you would like to speak further respond. I would be glad to provide support as I could use some.
Anon,
I'm so sorry you're experiencing this. And I'm sorry to hear that you are reconsidering your engagement, but I think that's smart. If this is your boyfriend's behavior before you are married, you can be sure it will continue after a marriage, and may even escalate. If you suspect extracurricular activity, I think you have to trust your intuition.
This sentence: "I am tired of crying and feeling undesirable" -- gives me a world of information. Yes, you are an attractive 33-year-old woman who does not need someone who makes you feel this way and who doesn't care if you do.
I know it's hard to throw in the towel; I am sure there are many things you do love about him. Would your boyfriend consider couples counseling before marriage?
I'm in the same boat you are! It does make me angry, he gets aggravated if I so much as brush my hand across his pants. Its causing me to become jealous and self conscious and I've tried to talk to him about it and he just says its not me! I don't get it! I'll try to initiate sex and then he just tells me he wants to "lay" with me. He even gets annoyed if I kiss on him too much.