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We've been dating for over a yer now but in the last few months our sex has drastically decreased at first started to go down from at least 1-2 times a day for at least 5 months and then it went down to 1-2 times a week and then to 1-2 times a month and now it's been a month and a half since we've had sex. I've read a few articles about this allready, but none seem to fit my problem exactly. I was worried for a while that it might be me that was the problem and but he told me it wasn't and i know he wouldn't lie to me. I've asked him about it but he says theres nothing wrong. I just don't know what to do anymore. He's only a year older than me and he's suppose to be in hes prime. Is there anything I can do? I Haven't pressured him or anything because I dont want him to do it just to shut me up. I want him to want to. and I'm just not satistied anymore and im not asking for everyday, at this point once or twice a week would be nice. A far as I know there's nothing he's stressed about at work or school, could it be a cobination of the 2? or something else going on that I don't know about? and please keep in mind that im am searching for help and advice and I don't want to hear find a new boyfriend. I love him and im not leaving him, even if it means were not going to have sex anymore. But it's frustration for the time being as I find it a tad odd that I want it more than he does. and I don't really want to talk to any of my friends abotu it because I live in a small town and this is personal and I don't need everyone talking about it. and the last thing I want him to feel is embarassed. I havn't told anyone of my friends but I'm in need of some advice. Any Ideas?
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Add a Comment1230 Comments
my boyfriend never wants sex and i'm attractive, not to be conceided but i get hit on everyday as a bartender. I kno my boyfriend isn't cheating b/c I know is every move, regardless of how creepy that seems. We live together, I see his time cards at work, he's crazy. I could go anywhere else for sex. Why am I waiting around for him to desire me again?
September 18, 2010 - 12:18amThis Comment
I must say I find it slightly amusing that women these days are facing the same problems men had to deal with for such a long time :) Well ladies, have fun trying to understand how men think and feel. And I like that female logic - When woman doesnt want sex its man fault. When man doesnt want sex its man fault. haha
September 17, 2010 - 1:58pmps. most of the stuff you read about guys in your girly magazines is BS that gets repeated over and over without any thought
This Comment
oh shut up, and kiss your boyfriend good night.
September 21, 2010 - 10:00pmThis Comment
ok
September 17, 2010 - 3:18amThis Comment
hi everyone
September 17, 2010 - 3:33amA man is a "complex" being! .Most women are monogamous,caring and nurturing. Man's sex drive in the beginning of a relationship is high,exciting and good. Woman needs TLC Man quite often like to gallivant around, flirt and continue till he gets caught. Many women are just the same. Once he gets to know his girlfriend, either there is no spice left or he is interested in someone else. He could be flirting with other women.
Are there any signals of cheating..google, very easy to find out.Is he being too detached, too evasive,has too many excuses, not being touchy or cuddly, not expressing his love, his honesty, being defensive, staying out often, being snappy, demeaning, putting you down. Then there is something wrong! BIG ..... Have self esteem, be independent, go do things on your own, go out with friends, ditch him and find someone that will care. Lot of nice guys out there or just be single for a bit and enjoy life. Dont take the abuse.
GOOGLE/signals for men that cheat/how to spice up life,relationship. If all fails, let him go.No one wants to get diseases, stress or health problems.
Try talking to him. If he is willing,open to communication or counseling, then lay the cards on the table. If he tries to avoid , then oops!!! something is not right. Relationship is not "rocket science" You know what he is doing. How would he feel if you were doing the same thing...Be Smart! Listen and Watch for signals. Wake Up! Neither men nor women deserve crappy , dishonest relationship. cheers Rozy
This Comment
give respect to yourself. do not have sex until married. im sure these guy been talking about you outside. it is too easy to get you or may be something else.
September 16, 2010 - 11:34amThis Comment
I have the same problem my boyfriend and I have been together for over a year we used to have sex 2 or 3 times a day when we first started dating then it was once a day then maybe twice a week now maybe once every 2 weeks. I love him so much I have no idea what's going on with him - I know guys don't get stressed out or stop thinking about sex that is in their nature so I really do think he has to be cheating on me I don't know what to do I don't wanna accuse him of anything but I don't have anything else on him but the fact that he doesn't want to have sex with me anymore. I need help I need to know how can I find out if he is really cheating on me
September 12, 2010 - 3:36pmThis Comment
Have you talked with him about your concern?
Please know that is completely normal---and healthy!---for a relationship to start out "hot and heavy" with frequent sex, and then this decreases over time for the vast majority of couples. It is healthy because as the couple grows and matures together, they find other enjoyable activities to do together, as well as separately. As individuals get older, the hormones are not quite so strong as when you are teenagers when it feels "uncontrollable" at times. This is part of the maturation process, and can be a good sign in your relationship that other things are important to each of you.
If you are thinking that your boyfriend is cheating on you, there must be other signs or concerns you have observed besides "only" having sex every few weeks? How is your relationship in other ways? Do you have mutual trust, respect, open communication, honesty and an overall healthy relationship? Do you have physical intimacy in other ways besides intercourse? Do you feel emotionally and mentally connected with one another? Are you both happy spending time together, apart as well as with friends?
September 12, 2010 - 7:34pmThis Comment
Great advise anonymous. Thank you for sharing.
September 12, 2010 - 8:25amThis Comment
my bf doesnt have sex with me iether! we been together for over 2 years we live together and work together. he talks about marriage and family..and says how much he loves me all the time, but no sex!! i dont understand. i know hes not cheating on me were together all the time in face hes sitting right next to me playing his god dam x box right now...its 5.30 am!! hes been playing all day. i gained 10 pounds since we got together, other than that nothing has changed. maybe i need new seducing techniques or i need to dress better or something? i dont know. but we went from having sex daily to maybe once a month..it hurts me and makes me feel unwanted even though i know he loves me. i dont want to sound needy or something but i definately need help. tips please!
September 12, 2010 - 5:30amThis Comment