Living with and possibly leaving a sick spouse - a heartfelt story from a reader looking for advice

When I sick my wife left me. After 15 years raising her daughter and provide for both. Now I talked to her a few weeks ago. And she was being nice. I was letting her know I was getting worse.
So then she ask how much insurance money she would be getting. I would not tell her. She quit talking to me now. So I take it this must be my fault as well from the rest of the post on here.

I have been with my partner for 9 years. What are support groups called for this?

I understand exactly how you feel. My spouse was diagnose with a Brain Tumor hopefully non- malignant, but she has changed drastically since the diagnoses. I feel trapped, unwanted, unappreciated, unloved and so much more. I feel awful feeling this way, but I really can't take it much longer. She could care less about me and I mean like I could die tomorrow and there wouldn't be any remorse whatsoever. I feel somehow she blames me for her diagnoses. I have assumed ALL the responsibilities of running a household with two children living at home. I'm going to a counselor this week, because I need to understand or at least try to. I feel that my life has ended!

My husband and I have been together 26 years. He was diagnosed with TIA and has found multiple blockages through out his bodies as well as 100% in his right neck. His attitude is horrible . Can't work (I understand he was a great provider) has put a lock on (what was our ) bedroom door. He is always angry and when he does say anything to me (never) it's so hateful. He refuses to help with car repairs, or groceries,( collects s.s.and retirement check) will not eat anything I cook, or wash his clothes. Some have heard some pretty nasty things he says of me(did I mention no intimate contact in 3 years) . He seems to work hard at professing "I don't want you or love you anymore" I'm so torn and at 54 , I'm scared. He promised FOREVER. I am depressed, crying , lonely (I really just need talking, acknowledgement,watching tv....all the things we were about. Trust me the sex thing I understand, I could love him even without it) I am ready to give up. I leave, it's just me, scared to attempt this again. I do love the man he once was. All the years of drinking and this illness may be the end. In more ways

When I married my husband 27 years ago he was healthy. He had MS for about 10 years. I love my husband even if he has MS or any other illness. My husband cheated on me early in our marrige, I didn't find out about it unil 20 years later, I forgave him and stayed married to him. For the past few years my husbands mood has changed drastically, he is very abusive towards me. He had physically abused me a couple of times and he repeatedly verbally abuses me. I feel as though I am constantly walking on eggshells trying to be careful of what I say or do around him, I know it is his MS making him this way so I try to not blow up at him but today I did, I couldn't help myself, I wanted to hurt him verbally like he hurt me, which I know is wrong. I don't know what to do anymore. He gets angry with me it seems for breathing to loud. I love him and don't want to leave him but I don't want to be called a whore at the top of his lungs, shouting outside in front of everyone that I am a bitch...it's very embarrassing for me. I also don't like being kicked in the stomach or choked almost to death. I wish someone would tell me how to stop this madness, I want the man I married back. Any advice would be appreciated.

I'm a married young women with MS and I hate feeling like I'm a burden on my husband. Every time a new illness pops up I ask him if he wants to leave (hoping the answer will always be NO). Some times we don't think about the pain that's in our body or really worry about what may break next... we worry about being alone. The reality of being diagnosed with a incurable disease his terrible BUT being diagnose and having to wonder if your loved ones are going to leave is worse. As a female I would go to counseling if my husband felt I needed it, but that's not always that simple for men whether their sick or health for that matter. Maybe you can find a counselor that's willing to come to your house for a "dinner party". Vows are important and should be honored BUT it does take two. Let your husband know how you feel and be honest. Don't sugar coated it keep it real. You can also do a trial separation. If you have family that you can stay with, go there for a while and let him see how much you're really doing for him. It sounds like he's taking you for granted and nothing makes the heart grow stronger than distance. Don't come back home until he goes to counseling and starts making changes. HE has to appreciate the marriage just as much as you if not more. Don't take this the wrong way but please don't talk with other men or go out and party during this time, because it will pull you towards divorce. Work on you! Take some caregivers classes or link up with other caregivers. Go out and relax with female friends that support your marriage and want to help you stay strong. You need and deserve a break and there's nothing wrong with getting it. Truthfully that's the only way to make it work. Once you guys get back on the right track schedule a mini vacation for yourself at least once a year. You're healthy now but your life could always change so enjoy yourself whenever you get a moment.